Reread of The Darkness That Comes Before, Part 16

Rereid of Prince of Nothing Trilogy

Book 1: The Darkness that Comes Before

by R. Scott Bakker

Part 5

The Holy War

Chapter 15

Momemn

Many have condemned those who joined the Holy War for mercenary reasons, and doubtless, should this humble history find its way into their idle libraries, they will blast me as well. Admittedly, my reasons for joining the Holy War were “mercenary,” if by that one means I joined it in order to procure ends outside of the destruction of the heathen and the reconquest of Shimeh. But there were a great many mercenaries such as myself, and like myself, they inadvertently furthered the Holy War by killing their fair share of heathen. The failure of the Holy War had nothing to do with us. Did I say failure? Perhaps “transformation” would be a better word.

—Drusas Achamian, Compendium of the First Holy War

Faith is the truth of passion. Since no passion is more true than another, faith is the truth of nothing.

—Ajencis, the Fourth Analytic of Man

My Thoughts

Søren Kierkegaard 19^th century existentialist philosopher taught that human desire that is beyond reason is passion and since faith is beyond reason, it is a passion. Faith drives humans to seek reality and truth that transcends the world and since we cannot intellectually. Since one cannot step outside the world and verify the truth of faith then it is hard to intellectually call it faith.

Spring, 4111 Year-of-the-Tusk, Momemn

Xinemus has finally convinced Proyas to see Achamian, and is cautioning Achamian as a slave leads them into Proyas's pavilion. Achamian sees the pavilion is disorganized, which is unlike Proyas and Xinemus answers that turmoil and crisis has gripped Proyas and he has had his staff “counting chickens,” a Conriyan phrase for futile endeavors Proyas is losing to the game to the Emperor.

Achamian prostrates himself when they enters Proyas section of the pavilion and Proyas coldly greets Achamian, calling him, “Schoolman.” Achamian asks about the raids in the valley and Proyas gets defensive about raiding other Inrithi for food. Xinemus disagrees about the proprieties of raiding fellow Inrithi and Proyas grows exasperated, pointing out that the Emperor was all but starving them with the pittance. Rudely he turns to Achamian and asks what he wants. Achamian realizes this was a mistake.

Achamian starts by asking Proyas if he remembers what he taught him all those years ago. Impatiently, Proyas remembers and quickly grows tired of Achamian “games.” Achamian carefully starts to lay his foundation for the possibility that the Holy War has been compromised Achamian is here to discover truth. Proyas asks if Achamian is here to lecture him, and Achamian replies that those days are past and he is just here to remind Proyas of what he was taught. Proyas derisively asks what he needs reminding of.

“I would merely remind you, my Prince, that when we’re most certain, we’re most certain to be deceived.”

Proyas smiled menacingly. “Ah . . . you would challenge my faith.”

“Not challenge—merely temper.”

“Temper, then. You’d have me ask new questions, consider troubling ‘possibilities.’ And what, pray tell, are these troubling possibilities?” The sarcasm was naked now, and it stung. “Tell me, Achamian, how great a fool have I become?”

In that instant, Achamian understood the depth to which the Mandate had been crippled. Not only had they become preposterous, they had become stale, a matter of rote. How does one recover credibility from such an abyss?

Achamian continues on, nonetheless, and points out that Holy War may not be as it seems. Proyas pretends astonishment and then goes on a spiel about the Emperor's “lecherous means to Restore his Empire,” to the “venal instrument of conquest and glory” of his peers to whatever vehicle the Scarlet Spire plots. Proyas asks, “What if this Holy War is in fact divine, a good in and of itself?” Achamian concedes that it's not impossible and Proyas's anger subsides and apologizes and offers the excuse that “the God tests me.” Proyas reveals that Galeoth troops led by Coithus Saubon massacred a village on similar foraging raids to Proyas and Achamian realizes that Proyas has defied Maithanet and sees hope in turning Proyas.

Achamian points this out and Proyas gets defensive and asks if the possibility of Maithanet being a Consult agent what Achamian wants him to consider. Achamian replies yes. Proyas careful says that he respects the Mandate mission and understands the “myths” that Achamian lives and asks if Achamian knows that it is blasphemy for him to consider that. Achamian understands and Proyas asks if there is actual proof of his suspicions. Achamian tells of Inrau's death in Sumna and Proyas dismiss that, since death is what would happen to any spy caught. Achamian then reveals that Maithanet can see the Few.

This forced a pause, but little else. “And you think I don’t know this? I was there, Akka! So he, like other great Shriahs before him, has the gift of seeing the Few. What of it?”

Achamian was dumbstruck.

“What of it?” Proyas repeated. “What does it mean other than that he, unlike you, chose the path of righteousness?”

Achamian protest that the dreams have become intense lately, that this has to mean something. Proyas snorts derisively. Proyas points out that Achamian is dismissive of Proyas faith about the God. When Proyas was a child, Achamian told him regarding God, “I've never met the man.” Proyas points out that Achamian has the same faith in the Consult.

His [Proyas's] voice hardened. “Faith is the truth of passion, Achamian, and no passion is more true than another. And that means there’s no possibility you could speak that I could consider, no fear you could summon that could be more true than my adoration. There can be no discourse between us.”

“Then I apologize . . . We’ll speak of this no more! I didn’t mean to offend—”

“I knew this would pain you,” Proyas interrupted, “but it must be said. You’re a blasphemer, Achamian. Unclean. Your very presence is a trespass against Him. An outrage. And as much as I once loved you, I love my God more. Far more.”

Proyas continues and says that Xinemus can continue to see Achamian, his soul is his own, but Proyas will not. Achamian, hurt by Proyas's statement, promise to leave him alone and asks only that Proyas ask Maithanet about Inrau's supposed suicide. Ask if Maithanet had him killed. Proyas asks why he would do this. “Because you loved me once,” answers Achamian before leaving. As he stood outside, Achamian mourns the death of all his students.

Inside the pavilion, Proyas asks what Xinemus disapproves of know. Xinemus asks Proyas if he felt his actions regarding Achamian were “wicked or righteous.” Proyas thinks and then answers that he felt nothing.

That night, Achamian dreams of the death of High King Celmomas and his Prophecy. The dreams plays out the same as it did in Chapter 1 with Celmomas having a vision of his son riding through the sky and his son tells him, “An Anasûrimbor would return … at the end of the world.” The High King then dies and Seswatha/Achamian mourns him.

Esmenet is shopping in a marketplace accompanied by Ertiga and Hansa, Sarcellus's body slaves. Esmenet is confused what her role is now. She is no longer a prostitute and thanks to Sarcellus, she is dressed liked the wife of a minor lord but isn't a wife. As the three shop, she notices a young man, an officer in the Eothic Guard, watching her. The man is very handsome, and Esmenet is excited by the attention. She is wearing a hasas, a linen wrapped garment popular amongst prostitutes for the way it would open on the side, revealing skin and enticing potential client. Esmenet leans over, exposing hidden flesh to the man who hungrily watches. She wonders if other women played these games in Sumna.

Esmenet notices Ertiga and Hansa giggling at her and demands to know what they are doing. Ertiga petulantly answers nothing. A spice merchant starts yelling at Ertiga for not showing respect to her mistress. Ertiga and Hansa have never acted properly with Esmenet. At first, Esmenet thought they were jealous of her, but now she suspects Sarcellus was responsible for their attitudes. Angry, she orders the girls to return to the pavilion. Ertiga sneers at Esmenet and spits at her feet.

The spice merchant starts to beat Ertiga for disrespecting her mistress and Hansa pulls her away and the two girls run off. Esmenet thanks the merchant who asks if she wants to buy any of his spices.

Esmenet realizes for the first time that she was alone since she met Sarcellus. Whenever Sarcellus wasn't around, the two slave girls were with her, watching her. She wonders if Sarcellus feared she would seek out Achamian and she is suddenly reminded of why she left Sumna in the first place.

They were watching Akka. They! He had to be told!

But then why did she hide from him? Why did she dread the thought of bumping into him each time she left the encampment? Whenever she glimpsed someone who resembled him, she would instantly look away, afraid that if she did not, she might make whoever it was into Achamian. That he would see her, punish her with a questioning frown. Stop her heart with an anguished look . . .

The spice merchant continues asking what she wants to buy and she notices the Eothic guard still staring at her and she feels a flush of heat in her loins. Esmenet decides she wants the stranger and stares back at the man. The stranger motions to the far end of the marketplace and she felt a nervous flutter. She thanks the merchant again and walks to where the stranger indicated. The stranger follows her until they reach a deserted area.

The man embraces her and she tells him that he has to pay, “No one eats for free.” Twelve silver talents is her price, and he's willing to pay until he sees her tattoo that marks her as a whore from Sumna. The man changes his mind, and won't pay more than twelve copper talents.

“Silver,” she said. Her voice sounded uncertain.

“A bruised peach is a bruised peach, no matter how you dress it.”

“Yes,” she whispered, feeling tears brim in her eyes.

“What was that?”

“Yes! Just hurry!”

Esmenet climaxes the moment the man enters her and a second time before he finishes. Afterward, the man is shamed at what he did and quickly leaves. Esmenet remains, trying to regain her composure Images of black seed on her belly flashes through her mind and she drops the copper coins.

Esmenet returns to Sarcellus's camp and finds Hansa and Ertiga bruised from the spice monger's beating. Ertiga continues to show insolence to Esmenet. Sarcellus asks where Esmenet has been and she says just walking. Esmenet thinks Sarcellus is smelling her when he reaches out and grabbed her. Sarcellus wants to have sex with her and she protests, still having the strangers seed n her.

When she's naked, Sarcellus asks who she was with. She doesn't answer and turns to the bed when Sarcellus violently grabs her. He slaps her and demands to know if it was Achamian. Hatred for Sarcellus stabbed through her and she hissed yes. Sarcellus releases her and apologized.

He embraced her—desperately. At first she remained stiff, but when he began sobbing, something within her broke. She relented, relaxed against the press of his arms, breathed deep his smell—myrrh, sweat, and leather. How could this man, so stern, more self-assured than any she had known, weep at striking someone like her? Treacherous. Adulterate. How could he—

“I know you love him,” she heard him whisper. “I know . . .”

But Esmenet was not so sure.

Achamian is surprised that Proyas has summoned him to a knoll overlooking the Holy War's camp. Proyas had realized he need Achamian and is annoyed by Achamian attitude. Achamian is curt and lacks deference and Proyas chastise him for not showing proper respect to Proyas's station. Achamian, using Proyas's diminutive name, Prosha, asks why after not even a week of being banned, did he summon him. Proyas tells Achamian that it's not his place to question him.

Achamian points out that even princes answer to reason. Proyas protests that he summoned a Mandate Schoolman based on their treaty and Achamian was just the nearest one. Proyas doesn't want to be drawn into another lecture today. Achamian, however, persists, saying he thought on Proyas's words from last time.

“What of it?”

Please, old tutor, leave this for another day!

“There’s faith that knows itself as faith, Proyas, and there’s faith that confuses itself for knowledge. The first embraces uncertainty, acknowledges the mysteriousness of the God. It begets compassion and tolerance. Who can entirely condemn when they’re not entirely certain they’re in the right? But the second, Proyas, the second embraces certainty and only pays lip service to the God’s mystery. It begets intolerance, hatred, violence . . .”

Proyas scowled. Why wouldn’t he relent? “And it begets, I imagine, students who repudiate their old teachers, hmm, Achamian?”

The sorcerer nodded. “And Holy Wars . . .”

Proyas is unsettled by that statement and quotes scripture at Achamian. Achamian scowls at him and Proyas feels disappointment from Achamian and sees pity in Achamian's eyes. Proyas tells Achamian not to judge him and wearily Achamian asks, again, why was he summoned. Proyas tells Achamian about Iryssas finding of a Scylvendi wanting to join the Holy War. Achamian is confused, asking if its a joke. Proyas's isn't sure, that why he summoned Achamian here. He expects Iryssas's arrival soon.

Proyas relates what he heard, that the Scylvendi travels with a foreign prince and a woman and that he claims to know the “Fanim manner of war.” He has defeated them and offers to share what he knows with the Holy War.

Achamian realizes that Proyas is hoping to defeat the Emperor's maneuvering with the Scylvendi. Proyas asks if Achamian has heard of the Scylvendi defeating the Fanim. Achamian says he heard of Scylvendi raiding of Fanim lands while in Shimeh. Proyas is stunned to learn that Achamian has been to Shimeh and Achamian, annoyed at the interruption, says he's been lots of places. Achamian continues, saying there was an expedition to steppes and the army, along with twenty Cishaurim, did not return.

Achamian continues, though, asking why a Sclyvendi help an Inrithi. Proyas asks if they hate us that much and Achamian asks, “Does a Momic Priest hate the bull whose throat he cuts?” For the Scylvendi, everyone else is their sacrifice which makes one joining the Holy War like … Achamian struggles with an analogy and Proyas, dismayed, says like striking a bargain with a sacrificial animal.

Proyas is dismayed and Achamian has never seen Proyas, even as a child, look so fragile. Achamian quickly points out that after Conphas's victory things may have changed. Proyas notices an approaching column and it is Xinemus, whom Proyas sent to meet Iryssas, returning with the Scylvendi.

From despair to eagerness in the bat of an eye. He’ll make a dangerous king, Achamian involuntarily thought. That is, if he survived the Holy War.

Achamian swallowed, tasted dust on his teeth. Habit, especially when combined with dread, made it easy to ignore the future. But this was something he could not do. With so many warlike men gathered in one place, something catastrophic simply had to follow. This was a law as inexorable as any in Ajencis’s logic. The more he remembered it, the more prepared he would be when the time came.

Somewhere, someday, thousands of the thousands about me will lie dead.

The nagging question, the one he found morbid to the point of sickness and yet felt compelled to ask, was, Who? Who will die? Someone must.

Me?

Achamian is chilled at the sight of the Scylvendi and Proyas asks what's wrong. Achamian remembers the dreams of the Apocalypse and the Scylvendi looks the same as those who joined the No-God two thousand years ago and Achamian has trouble sorting out the past from the present for a few moments. He stood upon ancient Kyraneas, destroyed by the Scylvendi during the Apocalypse and realized that Momemn was then a small town called Monemora.

Proyas is excited and sees in the Scylvendi someone who shares an enemy with the Nansur Empire and hopes an alliance can be made. Achamian protests, unnerved by his dreams lately, and says the Scylvendi is a heathen. Proyas points out that so is Achamian and then upbraids Achamian for giving poor counsel. Xinemus leads the Scylvendi and his party up the hill to Proyas who greets Cnaiür, praising his fierce look. The Scylvendi remains silent and Proyas frowns. Achamian tells him that Scylvendi think “wry compliments” are unmanly.

Cnaiür asks who Achamian is and spits when he learns he's a sorcerer. Proyas lets Cnaiür know he can have him delivered to the Nansur if he doesn't cooperate and asks who he is. When Achamian learns he is of the Utemot tribe, he is further unnerved. The King-of-Tribes during the Apocalypse was Sathgai of the Utemot. Achamian tells him what he knows of the Utemot.

Proyas nodded. “So tell me, Cnaiür urs Skiötha, why would a Scylvendi wolf travel so far to confer with Inrithi dogs?” The

Scylvendi as much sneered as smiled. He possessed, Achamian realized, that arrogance peculiar to barbarians, the thoughtless certitude that the hard ways of his land made him harder by far than other, more civilized men. We are, Achamian thought, silly women to him.

“I have come,” the man said bluntly, “to sell my wisdom and my sword.”

Cnaiür lies and says his tribe is dead and his people have repudiated him and he has renounced his lands and come to join the Inrithi. Proyas asks what he knows of the Kian matter of war. Cnaiür tells of the Fanim defeat at Zirkirta eight years ago. Cnaiür personally killed Hasjinnet, Skauras's son. Proyas continues questioning, asking if he knows Kianene tactics and asks if he could describe them. Cnaiür says he could. Proyas quickly relates to Cnaiür how the Empire is holding the Holy War hostage with his Indenture and how Cnaiür could be the instrument to defeat him.

Cnaiür realizes that Conphas is the Emperor's price and Proyas fears Maithanet will sell the Holy War. Cnaiür is amused that he will be “the Exalt-General's surrogate.” Achamian realizes he must hate Conphas because of Kiyuth. Proyas asks Achamian if thinks the Scylvendi is here for revenge and Achamian tells Proyas to ask him and ask who travels with them. Proyas asks why Cnaiür joined the Holy War and Kellhus steps forward, saying he is the reason.

“And just who are you?” Proyas asked of the man.

The clear blue eyes blinked. The serene face dipped only enough to acknowledge an equal. “I am Anasûrimbor Kellhus, son of Moënghus,” the man said in heavily accented Sheyic. “A prince of the north. Of Atrithau.”

Achamian gaped, uncomprehending. Then the name, Anasûrimbor, struck him like a sudden blow to the stomach. Winded him. He found himself reaching out, clutching Proyas’s arm.

This can’t be.

Proyas warns Achamian to stay silent with a glance and addressed Kellhus, saying he has a powerful name. Celmomas prophecy echoes in Achamian's head as Proyas and Kellhus speak. Kellhus says he has come on pilgrimage to “die for the Tusk.” Proyas asks who Kellhus learned of the Holy War in Atrithau and, hesitantly, Kellhus answers “Dreams. Someone sent me dreams.”

My Thoughts

Proyas black mood seems to me more about being forced to disobey the Shriahs orders against pillaging just so he can supply his men. Having to play this game with the Emperor with such Holy matters is not something Proyas is equipped to handle.

That's a low blow, Proyas, pointing out that Xinemus is Achamian's only friend. Achamian is a lonely guy.

Achamian this is not the way to bring someone to your view. You should study apologetics. It can be very difficult to covert someone of a different faith and one of the best ways is to use their own teachings to lead them to your viewpoint.

Interesting that Proyas doesn't know if he feels what he did was right or wrong in throwing out Achamian. He still cares for his tutor but is blinded by his beliefs which call Achamian an abomination.

Before Achamian Dreamed, he had a dream of Inrau warning him: “They're here, old teacher! In ways you cannot see!” Considering the skin spies, there is truth in this dream. But whether this is really Inrau or just a nightmare that happens to be true is left open.

Esmenet is not sure of her place anymore. Esmenet enjoys the attention of the handsome man because she fears getting older and her beauty fading. She charges money because she has no self worth. From the way men have treated her to the trauma she's still suffering from the Consult rape.

Esmenet figures out that Sarcellus is watching her but thinks that ridiculous. Just keep that line of thinking up, Esmenet. Trust your instincts on Sarcellus and get away from him.

Creepy, Sarcellus, smelling her. And the way he's aroused by smelling the other man on Esmenet. He almost lost control. These skin spies are a real piece of work.

Esmenet's feelings about Achamian are confused. She's afraid he will reject her after she walked all this way and she's doesn't think she can handle it. How many of us were too afraid to ask out someone we liked for that same reason and watched them slip away.

Achamian quote on faith is a great one. Acknowledging both the good and bad of faith.

The sight of Cnaiür causes Achamian to have some PTSD flashbacks to the war and he is off-balanced for the entirety of the meeting. It also makes him very suspicious of Cnaiür's actions.

Cnaiür quickly figures out why Proyas needs him and realizes he has a strong bargaining position. Lucky for Cnaiür and Kellhus that the Emperor is such a jackass. Probably, more lucky for Cnaiür since I'm sure Kellhus could talk his way out of most problems.

Poor Achamian. It must be hard to realize the end of the world is at hand.